Brogramming: How does a programmer become a brogrammer?

Attire

• Polo, tight so the chicks can see how defined your muscles are
• Sunglasses, mostly mirrored aviators and multi-colored wayfarers, but mostly any type of sunglasses are accepted

• Writing code with blankets seem to be popular, but not mandatory

• Always look good, always.

What to do:

• Code, always test your code, not testing is a douchegrammer move.
• Code, often. Code hard.
• Rage in PHP or your favorite language, just code.
• Rage at the gym, to attract the chicks and scare the dicks.

This is a good photo due to the location: Google Seattle offices, the action: raging at the gym, and the attire: A chill Ed Hardy shirt.

• Rage in the club, be sure to wear the proper attire as stated above.
• Listen to ice cream paint job by Dorrough, and live it.

Code written by a brogrammer after a hard night of raging in the gym and the club.

• Remember your flow charts

Food:

• Drink beer, the only specified type I have heard of is Natural light, known as "Natties" in this post http://www.facebook.com/photo.ph...

(Nick Schrock is the creator of the brogramming page on Facebook.)

• Drink your protein, after raging in the gym to ensure defined muscles.

Sunglasses indoors, be chill.

• Sugar-free Red Bull is also a drink of prominent choice

• The brogramming approved breakfast

"Brogramming-approved breakfast: steak and eggs, extra egg, sub fruit for potatoes. Carbs, low; protein, high; satisfication-level; high indeed. Plenty of ragefuel for weekend of coding and Getting Amped."

Everything I know about Brogrammers I learned from the movie Swordfish.
A Brogrammer....

• can work well under the tightest deadlines, or while receiving oral sex.
• maintains a solid 120 wpm on the keyboard while drunk and dancing
• can figure out how to drive a stick in the middle of a gunfight
• doesn't make johnny five style comments ("nice software") around the ladies
• Respects Quora's policy on short answers to questions.

At the 2011 Twilio Conference Rob Spectre, aka "Chad" gave the definitive primer on brogramming:

Lots of red meat, push-ups on one hand, while coding on the other, sunglasses at all times, a tan is important, popped collar is a must. It's important that you can squash anyone who might call you "geek" or "nerd" and that you can pick up girls, but also equally important that you know the Star Wars movies by heart, and understand programming ideas, like recursion and inheritance.

Typically there is training involved in Brogramming. At Gravity we take it very seriously and dedicate time to pair-brogramming sessions on the Treadmill Desk. This works our agility and stamina while churning out hip scala code.

The key to this as well as any other pursuit in life is perseverance. Brogrammers aren't born, they're made.  

Male programmers are finally catching up to where girl-coders have been for several years?

• Don't spend all your time BBMing at the club - girls see it, girls know you're talking about them, and it makes you look douche (not bro).  Double if you have a wingman with you.
• Have the nice car.  However, avoid the douche move of racing, drifting, or anything meant to resemble either one.  Massive tickets, impounds, and wrecks are not bro.
• Get your finances in order before trying to impress girls.  Bounced checks, maxed credit cards and bankruptcy are douche, not bro.
• Respect the girl-coders.  Some of them can set you on your @$$, no matter how hard you rage at the gym.  Also, girl-code is prettier.
• Share the steak and eggs at breakfast.  Girls require protein, too, and you don't produce enough of it on your own.
• Feel free to go metro.  Be aware that if you're prettier than the girls, all your brogramming will be for naught.  Girls WILL assume you are closeted and you WILL be relegated to Friend Status.
• Code.  Code hard... but know when to put it away.  If a girl walks past in a see-through teddy, and you don't even look up because you're neck-deep in code, expect to spend a lot of time celibate no matter how bro you go.

Party hard, then study.  Specifically, familiarize yourself with the following terminology:

Recursion:  Drink!  Then see "Recursion"

Rekiurshhun:  Drunk!  Then see double (get some, bro!)

Iteration:  adding ladies to (or subtracting bros from) the entourage until the bouncer at Le Club lets you in

Inheritance:  trust fund, Seaside Heights beach house

Debugging:  clean pubes, brah

stdout:  peace-ing after a one night stand
(alternate definition: see "Debugging")

C++ = a gnarlier, "brogrammers-only" version of C

High level language:  the lingua franca of every brogrammer in Amsterdam

Loop (bro's infinite): 
var i = 0; // (don't be a loser like i, bro)
while(i < 1) {
console.log("uhn-tzz uhn-tzz uhn-tzz uhn-tzz ");
}

Boolean:  a logical data type with two possible outcomes; in brogramming, 'true' and 'truer'
(alternate definition:  gettin' freaky with wifey)

Knapsack Problem:  non-brogrammer's Fanny Pack Problem

PHP:  player-hating poser

JavaScript:  prescription Starbucks

Divide and conquer:  a totally awesome strategy for dominating at beer pong

Brogrammers should have intimate knowledge of the following:

Doobie on Rails
brode.js
Albrorithms

Brogramming 101:
1) Shirtless
2) Sunglasses (w/ bifocals)
3) Headphones & dubstep

15 perfect pushups every hour on the hour == coding break!

From what I can see, the primary criteria is the willingness to look like a try-hard and to use a Mac.

See above.

Alas, despite mad technical skills I will never be a member of the elite circle of 'brogrammers'. See, I was born with ovaries and breasts. I have sat up at night trying to devise clever plans to infiltrate this elusive circle of super secret friends. It makes me sad.

Like that?

Read Bro Git by Scott Chacon. Octopus merges are great for the abs.

(http://progit.org/)

"Essential Gear For Brogrammers" - http://www.brogrammers.org

Brogramming on da plane, Miami - Las Vegas(You know what i mean bro!) The code: https://github.com/melizeche/Bat...