What is it like to be a conventionally attractive woman, do you enjoy it, is it burdensome and would you exchange this for less conventional attractiveness and few headaches, et cetera?

In my experience, it kind of sucks. Females are mostly catty/bitchy/competitive/mean and males...well, it's near impossible to tell if a guy is interested in YOU or your body (it's usually the latter).

Growing up, I didn't think of myself as attractive. I was a late bloomer. I was the youngest, smallest, and smartest kid in my class from kindergarten until high school. My ears stuck out and the boy I had a crush on nicknamed me "rat girl" in 8th grade because apparently I looked like a small rodent. But I was pretty. I was too smart for the pretty girls and too pretty for the smart girls, which meant I didn't have any friends. The only people who were nice to me were boys, so I was friends with some of them. That made the girls be even meaner to me, which I didn't understand because I didn't "like" the boys, just wanted friends, ya know?

In high school, I got beat up by 2 larger, older girls at a party (the first and only one I attended) and had to go to the hospital with a grade 3 (knocked unconscious) concussion, and multiple contusions covering my head, arms and legs. At the ER, they assumed I was a typical drunk party girl and didn't even run a CT to check for damage. I was teased and bullied at school for the rest of high school and that was when I first started considering suicide. The reason the girls jumped me? One of their ex-boyfriends kissed me on the dance floor. It started with my being pushed across the dance floor to the ground and having a beer poured out into my head. Then they found me outside and proceeded to beat the shit out of me, punching me in the face and head until I passed out. I woke up to being kneed in the head repeatedly.

Prior to that experience, I was called a slut and whore, to my face and behind my back, before I'd even kissed anyone. I was 13-15.

In college, girls I thought were my friends ended up making out with guys I had told them I liked, and I'd overhear them saying really mean things about me. One roommate screamed at me for getting better grades than her one semester.

Once I started medical school at the age of 25, I thought I was past all that. But my first semester there, I was yet again called a slut and a whore by a classmate who liked a guy who told her he liked me (I knew nothing of this). Few classmates believed I belonged there since, due to my appearance, I couldn't possibly have been smart enough to have gotten in on merit alone, and they treated me as such. Even when quoting directly from an open textbook, classmates would argue with my answers to questions.

As an adult in my 30's now, I am still treated like I'm stupid. The most common exchange is: "So, what do you do?" "I'm a doctor." "No seriously, what do you do?"

So let me tell you, after 25 years of education, dedication, and hard hard work (I did not come from money, I supported myself through college and med school by working at restaurants), it has not been to my advantage to be "hot".  

Also, i look about 7-10 years younger than my actual age, further contributing to the disbelief that I am what I am (intelligent) and have accomplished what I have (become a physician).

In short, being hot has meant that I haven't been taken seriously in my career or education, it's nearly impossible to make friends, I don't get hit on (something sbout being "intimidating" despite my 5'3" stature), and the men that do approach me are clearly only doing so because of what they see (once I say I'm a doctor they head for the hills).

As far as any advantages? I've never gotten free stuff, gotten out a ticket, or received any other kind of special treatment. If anything, it's almost like people want to treat me worse because they assume my life has been easy since I'm "hot." As a friend once said, "it's because pretty people don't have feelings."

I suppose the grass is always greener.

Early in life:

• I became vain - people commented on my looks constantly. This led to dissatisfaction because no matter how lovely I am no one is perfect 100% of the time. Also, if I was not complimented, I felt ugly.
• I became shy from often having unwanted attention, and I feared not meeting expectations. This caused social anxiety and a dislike for being around new people.
• I never needed to develop personality, as people were most interested in my looks.
• Some boys in school harbored crushes on me from elementary/middle school until the end of high school (none ever acted on the crushes).
• In high school boys starting openly making passes at me in about 7th grade. I was completely unresponsive because I neither wanted their attention nor knew how to react, so I developed a reputation for being icy. Eventually, no guys from school attempted to ask me out.
• I couldn't tell the difference between people (boys and girls) hitting on me and being friendly - that got me in all sorts of awkward situations.

In general:

• I am liked and trusted by most people I meet, and therefore am made a leader in group situations and hear all sorts of personal problems from people I barely know.
• I alway attract male and female attention. The female attention isn't always sexual, but can be weirdly sycophantic.
• I have few male friends, and most male friends I do have have noticeable crushes on me.
• Men that befriend me will dissappear once learning I have a boyfriend.
• I've learned to be very vigilant about my surroundings, in case there is a creepy guy eyeing me.
• Guys act weird around me sometimes.
• I have broken many hearts.*
• Men speak in a different tone to women they are falling for - when I was younger I inadvertently developed a fear of that tone, and would run at the first hint of it.

• I can tell if a guy finds me attractive immediately by how he looks at me.
• It is very easy to dress up, as it is not hard to look good.
• I had to actively develop my personality.

What I have learned:

• I've stopped caring about how beautiful others are; beauty isn't rare to me and other things are more interesting. Like confidence!
• Hearing I am beautiful is no longer flattering - it's like being told I have brown hair. Oh really? Thanks, I never realized.
• It feels silly to be modest and skirt around the fact that so many find me pretty. At least with close friends, I've given up on the pretense of modesty. People that aren't close get put off by this and often seem cold afterwards. Ah well.

Summary:

1. Find hobbies you love. Look for an activity where time disappears while you're doing it.
2. Change your surroundings. You can do this by reading (fantasy, romance, self-help, articles, anything). Of course, you can travel. I also started following TV shows even though growing up I rarely watched TV. These all bring you into a world other than your own and make you ask questions you never had to face.
3. Ask those big, intimidating questions. There may be no answer, but that's OK. Or you might find out you're spiritual, and that gives you comfort. And they're not always "what happens after we die?" They can be "why do I feel this way?" Those are even harder to answer.
4. Develop opinions, even if no one asks you about them.
5. Face your fears. Daily. Being socially anxious, talking to anyone scared me. Reading "How to Win Friends and Influence People" gave me enough confidence to be myself in any situation because I was no longer afraid of people's reactions.
6. Laugh! Find out what makes you laugh, and laugh as often as you can. This may be tied into the social anxiety thing, but it wasn't until I began laughing freely that I began feeling comfortable with myself.
7. Actively put your personality around you.Decorate in a way you love, dress in a way that makes you strut, eat a breakfast that makes you excited for the mornings. When you start out not knowing who you are, this is hard - half the things you do/make/buy won't be right. But that's the whole point!

Being attractive is a mixed bag: On the one hand, you get a lot of free stuff and a good pick at being with other attractive people, but it can also be very alienating. You also sometimes find yourself acting very entitled, and it can be a big shock when you're put into a situation where the privilege you receive from being attractive is taken away.

Positives That Stick Out The Most To Me:

Free Things: People usually assume that I'm trustworthy and have a tendency to want to please me because I'm attractive. Many times I've made some pretty unrealistic demands to people and they have acquiesced with very little resistance. I find it's very easy to get free things just by asking. Quick Example: When I was younger, and less responsible, my headphones broke, so I went to the store to get them replaced, however, they told me that they could not replace my headphones because I didn't have the receipt anymore. In response I just pouted, and almost instantly the sales person relented and let me have the headphones anyway if I "kept it a secret."

I get free drinks a lot. If I go out to a bar (which is something I rarely do, since I don't really like drinking) as long as there are large groups of men approximately a decade or so within my age group, I can go the whole night without ever spending any money on drinks. Even bartenders will give me free drinks just for sitting at the bar.

(Someone already mentioned this: Begging is super easy.)

Other Attractive People Are Attracted to Me: This one's pretty self explanatory. I basically can choose whoever I want.

You Get Treated Like You're Special: People in general are more excited to come up to talk to me and try to please me. If they're not giving me free things, they're complimenting me. I get stopped in the street a lot and get compliments on my hair, a lot.

People go out of their way to comment on my skin very often-- I don't really wear make up ever, and when I do it's usually just lipstick. A lot of people will be in awe at how "soft" my skin is and are always asking me what my secret is (I'm currently going through chemotherapy for Leukemia, and people find it very hard to believe that I'm sick because I still look relatively good). People also assume very often that I'm wearing makeup, which I've always thought of as kind of funny since I'm allergic to most makeups.

Negatives That Stick Out The Most To Me:

Insecure Women Perceive Me As A Threat: (This mostly happens when I'm faced with "less attractive," straight, insecure women) I tend to get condescended to a lot. Other women will act very catty with me and try to make my life harder for their own amusement. I had this problem a lot in college when even though I was usually either just as intelligent on the matter, or more so, I would be written off as a dumb "Pretty Girl." (Thankfully this was mostly an issue with peers, as all of my professors were mature, and emotionally stable adults)

I have quite literally been told that people didn't respect me because they thought I was just another "Pretty Girl." I had never had this issue until I went to college.

I don't believe this is a natural phenomenon, however. I believe society teaches women to identify other women as "threats," instead of allies. So while it's not appreciated, I can't blame people for their insecurities and social programing.

I also get constantly punished by resentful girlfriends of men who are attracted to me. I have never in my life desired, or attempted, to try to "steal" someone's partner, however I am constantly being accused of doing so.

Sometimes friends will start to resent me, which can really hurt, so I'll try not to dress up or look too "good" in front of them so they don't have to feel as insecure around me. I've been catcalled with a friend next to me, and I'll see them wither with disappointment because I was very clearly the target. Which I think is really tragic, because I usually think they're beautiful in their own way, and they shouldn't be using street harassment as a metric for their self worth.

I Am A Walking Target For Harassment: If I walk outside alone (Or more specifically: without a man to accompany me) I almost always get catcalled. I've had random strangers get down on their knees in front of me on the street and propose.

I've had people beg me to let them take me somewhere to buy me drinks while I was just walking (usually to the supermarket). I get constantly whistled at. If I'm somewhere very solitary, sometimes men will come up to me and start masturbating next to me. I get groped a lot on the subway. I've also had men come up to me in their cars and either try to get me to come in, or they'll just start acting out lewd sexual acts in front of me.

On some days it can be kind of "cute" when I'm just minding my own business, and a man walks by and notices me, and swivels around and exclaims something like 'Daaamn!" When it's very clear it's more congratulatory than harassment.

But sometimes it can be really scary:

I was once stalked by a friend of an ex-boyfriend who had become obsessed with me over watching me from a distance over the few years I had been in that certain relationship.

When I left that particular boyfriend, the friend's obsession for me intensified. It got so bad that he not only broke into my building and watched me from the roof while I was on a date with someone. But he then threatened to break my face open, kill the person I'd been on a date with, and tried to jump off of my roof.

All while he cooed that my face was so beautiful because I looked like a human doll, and that it also terrified him because of how unnatural my features looked.

He would then send me letters by blackmailing my friends, and tell me he wanted to kill himself and haunt me as a ghost to "protect" me.

In the end I called the police and his family and he was admitted into a mental institution.

To this day I still suffer from what happened. For a long time I was afraid of even entering my own house, because I kept thinking he was still on the roof watching me. If I see men who look like him I immediately get anxiety attacks.

A lot of people don't understand that very often being attractive also means people don't always see you as a human being, and instead they see you as an object for the taking.

I am NO ONE'S doll.

It Makes You Feel Entitled: When I first started going on to the internet, I was horrified to find that people weren't instantly nice to me. I would grumble things like: "You wouldn't say that to me if we were face-to-face."

But then I realized that that was actually kind of a good thing. For the first time, I could get judged for my thoughts instead of my looks. I realized it was a lot more gratifying to be complimented for my intelligence and my personality.

I liked the anonymity that the internet brought me, because it gave me a chance to excel in other areas instead. Online, I'm not allowed to fall back on my looks (Or at least I don't give myself that opportunity) I have to defend myself like anyone else would, gain trust like anyone else would, and become a valuable member of the community the same way that anyone else does-- I don't get to cheat.

-- That being said, I like being attractive, and I don't resent it. I take care of myself, and I think I earned the way I look through years of exercise and a good diet. I'm proud of that. I put the effort in and it paid off. I'm not naturally skinny, and if I don't eat well I will start to break out. I'm not a superhuman.

I was 9 when I had my first period. By the time I was 11, I was a small-waisted, C-cup girl with very wide hips.

On buses, I would sometimes get this weird feeling that someone just grabbed me.

I would walk by men beside my mother and get called out.

I would go down the street and some cars would slow and roll down their windows to look at me.

As years went by, I realized this was actually all extremely creepy. And I realized that when I "thought" someone was touching me on the bus, someone had legit been touching me on the freaking bus. I was being groped as a fucking 11 year old because I had curves. Men thought I was 16 or older so they were flirting with an 11 YEAR OLD.

Now I'm a DD cup. Small waist still. Big butt that African-American women are known for (except that I'm Asian and Caucasian).

Nothing's changed. When I was in 8th grade, 9th, 10th, 11th, 12th, doesn't matter. Cars will drive by and honk at me. Men will shout out their windows at me. Guys will call me out as I'm walking down the street and follow me until I say hi. Others will insist on getting my number. The only time they don't is when they think the guy I'm walking with is either my father or boyfriend, and yet will do it when it's my mother or sister. It's disgusting. They are very quick to leave me alone if another guy beside me gives them a look, but when I tell them to back off in a no less serious way, it only fuels them further.

One time, I had gone into this store, and there was this guy who was trying to sell phone plans. He had started to hand me a pamphlet, and when he saw me, just about to begin his dialogue, he just stopped and couldn't seem to think straight. He just stared at me for a moment, and since he wasn't talking I just smiled kindly and walked away while he had to go onto somebody else. 3 minutes later he was walking around, and I came across him again. Within 4 minutes we had crossed each other's paths 5 times and the 6th time, he finally stopped me and said, "Oh, hey, it's you again. Hey, so, what's your ethnicity?" We talked a little. He seemed really nice. I had dismissed how he was staring at me in a weird way, but, later on we started texting and it wasn't long before he asked me for a picture of my breasts because he was "curious how they look". I realized that this guy had literally been hunting me down in the store because of my body.

I never liked this attention, and I never will. When I was a little younger, however, I felt vulnerable because of it. Even on the hottest days, you would not find me in shorts, skirts, or anything skin-revealing, without leggings underneath, including long sleeves and high-neck shirts. I don't do that anymore because, you know what? You can holler at me all you want. You're right, I can't really stop you unless I want to get violent. Which I don't, want to. And you're not going to make me want to. You can say whatever you want to me and try to embarrass me, but it's not going to work. YOU look like an idiot to everybody else around you when you do that. I, just look like a poor victim to the others. So, I really don't understand why you bother. It's fucking dumb. Seriously.

It is true that there are a lot of "perks" to being a "hot girl". But there also isn't if you look at it a certain way. People think it's a "perk" for guys to want to do everything for you. If you don't grow up a specific way, it's not, because you're going to grow up used to guys doing your work for you. I can't tell you how easy school would have been if I allowed boys to do everything they wanted to do for me. Attractive girls often become pretentious women because they are held on such high pedestals. They're treated like goddesses and then they develop the worst personalities when things don't go their way.

It's not a perk for people to look right past your personality and just see that you're pretty. It's not a perk for employers to think you're "just another woman who's too pretty for her own good and doesn't have any talents beyond that".

When you look like me, people also think you are always sexually-available. They think you're some kind of porn star. You must be really sexually adventurous because you have breasts and a large butt, right? No. I'm still a virgin. And actually, I intend to stay that way. I'm a celibate, just because. People told me I would change my mind when I was in college, and I'm plenty years past that point. I have no discomfort with the idea of sex, nudity, or anything like that - people can see me naked, and I couldn't really care less. I'm personally not sexual (but I still have a sex drive; that's just my biology. Everybody has one unless by some accident, or you're asexual, which I wish I was because that would just make things more simple), yet I have an hourglass figure.

What is it like to be a hot girl?

It's...

funny: Seeing how people fall down at your feet, how they bend over backwards to appease you, how people suddenly feel entitled to yell things at you.

Depressing: Because people do all of the above for a nice body and pretty face. I also have yet to find any guy friend who does not end up asking me out and making things awkward after I thought we were clearly friends. I then constantly re-think what I am about to do or say, considering the fact that they could take it the wrong way.

Enlightening: Since you really get some insight into how some people behave and why.

Annoying: Guys are going to read into everything you do. Did you purposely drop something so that you could bend over and pick it up to show them your ass (I kneel instead now)? When you smiled at them, omg do you like them!? You're being nice - that means you're interested, right? Surely? Certainly! You have to be careful of everything you are doing because while YOU are not sending the wrong message, THEY are receiving it wrong. Then somebody gets hurt one way or another and things are awkward, again. I've stopped being so careful though because I just am not going to try to police how people end up thinking anymore. They should be more self-aware and stop jumping to conclusions.

Confusing: You may never know if you got hired so easily because the guy wants to have sex with you, if you didn't get hired because the woman is jealous of you, if someone is being nice to you because they want to get in your pants, if you would have gotten far as you have if you weren't attractive, or even if you would have the personality you do if you weren't... There's a lot of things to question, when you're deemed 'attractive'.

In some other countries I bet I would be considered hideous. And cowish. It's really amusing. I'm kind of tempted to find out where that would be, because then I would also know what it's like to be an "ugly girl". Until then I can only assume that it's equally hard, and to be average - not attractive nor unappealing - is the jackpot.

EDIT: Thank you everybody for the support! I'm glad this has reached some people.

I try to respond to comments if there's something for me to say. If I don't say anything, just know I certainly read it, and I appreciate your time :)



EDIT 2: Hoooooly cow, it is crazy the attention this has gotten, especially as an anonymous answer :O!

I look back here to see if there are new comments, and I DO read them, and many I have begun to answer but I dwell on it and see if I want to add anything more. So it can take a few days, or...week...or more. Others, I answer right away because it's easy to do so and I don't really need to think on it much. So don't think I'm ignoring anybody! I tryyy to leave something meaningful or some other kind of response if I can because you've all taken the time to write something. Thank you!

To further illustrate, I will tell you what I was wearing today. I was in capri jeans. I was wearing a non-fitting t-shirt that says "Honey badger don’t care" and flats. My hair was up in a messy bun. I had just been to see my aesthetician, so my face was appropriately red from the trauma of her administrations. There you go. This is the irresistible image that prompted the events of my afternoon.

Thanks for the A2A.
It is a wonderful compliment to get from people.
As it is with every situation in life, being considered "atttractive" by people has its own pros and cons.
I have been on both sides of the spectrum, and hence I clearly know the difference.
First of all, I want to put it out there, that being attractive is matter of perception, different people have different definitions. If you are considered attractive because you are fair, have nice well defined features, and great hair, ask yourself, What did you do to get all this? These are genes that you inherited. You will be truly attractive if people like you for what you are, for what you have done in your life.

When people start calling you attractive, they start defining you by how you look. Your body will overpower your soul. You will most often than not, end up just being a pretty face. Cracked an interview? Of course, you did it because you are pretty. People liking your answers and following you on quora? Because you are pretty. People want to befriend you. Come on, You are pretty!
Honestly, it is irritating.

You will find a lot of people wanting to befriend you. You know why? Not because they like you, not because you are a good person. You may be dumb, rude and arrogant. People would still want to be with you. Well, You are pretty. It brings along a lot of apprehension because it becomes hard to know, who your true friends and well wishers are.

Finding love is never easy. I know a lot of people would be following you around, texting you all day, asking you out on dates. But to find that one person, who can tell you, Why he loves you, is very difficult. I ask this question to people very often. And I almost everytime end up getting the same answer. Because you are hot/ pretty/ Beautiful.

Jealousy. I find it really hard to gel up with girls, the main reason being them being uncomfortable with the way I look, some find me too dressy ( Like why does it even bother you? ), some think I am a flirt because of the male attention I get. Jealousy can be a little hard to deal with at times.

There are some obvious advantages like more people trying to be friendly, and helpful towards you. Like getting a lot of compliments. And there is definitely a confidence boost. But I would still any day prefer being called intelligent or smart or a nice & genuine person than being labelled "attractive".

"Hi, you're HOTT!  Wanna watch me jerk off on cam?"  O_o 

Since when did "Hi, wanna see my penis?" become a greeting

that ppl thought was...attractive?  O_o 

That was the first message I got when I joined one social site.  :/  I immediately wanted to delete the account I had just created.  Then I decided not to let one inappropriate weirdo form my entire opinion...and I'm glad I did because it became my favorite site for quite a while!  :)  I developed an awesome circle of friends and it was a lot of fun!  The site decided to to change the name & it morphed into a dating/hookup site, though, and all the quality people and I left.  I still miss it sometimes.  :)

You get inundated with messages from people you don't even know, who think that you should be answering & giving them your undivided attention just because they reached out to you!  I'm sure a lot of them are nice people and all...but they don't understand that answering all those damn messages would be a full-time job in and of itself!  :/ 

They'd ask the same things over & over...even if they could have just scroll through my feed or profile to see the answer.  Which means that they just looked at my pic & didn't even care who I was...they liked what they saw and based my "worth" on that.  :(  They didn't like ME, didn't even see ME.  They only saw what they wanted to see...it had nothing to do with me, really. 

GOD FORBID you look at someone's profile (the site told you who viewed you), "liked" someone's funny pic or comment, made a comment on something...for some reason guys are just like "Oh yeah...that means she WANTS me!"  O_o

"I'm not even going to bother trying...'Girls Like You' wouldn't even bother with somebody like me..."  :(  No, I wouldn't...not for the reasons he thought, though.  These guys are just as bad as the others.  They're stereotyping based on looks while complaining that women don't give them a chance because they don't look like some hott guy, they're just "average".  smh    They're objectifying people just as much as the rest.  It's not what they look like that makes them unattractive...it's their insecure, negative attitude. 

Fun Fact: I LIKE "average" guys...I don't like the "hott" guys or the "rich" guys. 

WHY?  Because, despite what other people see me as...I'm just me.   When I was younger, I hated "laying out", I'd rather have fun than worry about messing up my hair or breaking a nail...and the guys did fun things like going quading...I LOVED doing that!  I'm also "anti-drama", unlike many women.  At some point, however...the guys stopped wanting to be my "friend" 'cuz I wasn't hanging out with the guys for attention & I wasn't a "tomboy", I didn't stop being female & act like a guy...I just liked to have fun!  :)  I have some girl-friends...but they have pretty much the same views on things as I do. 

I'm REAL & I like people who are just REAL, too!  :)  I was the slightly chunky, awkward girl that nobody noticed.  Suddenly I'm getting a lot of attention over something that didn't have anything to do with WHO I AM.  :(  It made me VERY uncomfortable...I was never the type that sought attention.  I just missed having friends & connecting with people. 

It's WEIRD!  O_o  Not just online, in "real life", too!  :( 

I was at a gf's house, sitting outside, & one of the neighbor guys came over & started talking to me...he went on for like 20 minutes about things that make his nipples hard.  O_o  I just sat there, a bit appalled, thinking "Why?  What would possibly possess a person to just walk up to me & talk about their nipples?  WTF?"

The weather had finally broke & it was a beautiful spring day!  So I went for a walk & swung by the library.  When I left the library & walked downtown...there was a guy that followed me.  At first I was just like "Nah, you're just paranoid, ya freak!  He's probably just going in the same direction!" So I turned...then turned again, and again!  He was DEFINITELY following me...and continued to for TWO HOURS!  O_o  I was pretty creeped out...so I went back to the library 'cuz it was a public place & I was afraid to go home & have this guy know where I lived!!  I sat down & opened my laptop...and he sat a little bit away.  He sat there for another hour or so watching me.  :/  It was REALLY CREEPY! 

It has its good points, like anything...but for a woman who actually values substance, it kind of sucks.  You can't just "be yourself".  People see you as an "object" & don't stop to consider the reality that...

"This is a REAL PERSON that you're talking to.  Just like anybody else. She has her own insecurities, an actual mind & *gulp* feelings that go beyond 'I feel pretty'."  :(

My good friend, Ryan, was on that site, too.  He messaged me one day & was like "WTH is wrong with women?  I message them & either they don't message back or they're guarded & sometimes downright RUDE!  They don't even take the time to see that I'm a good guy!" 

Ryan REALLY IS a great guy!  :)  He just didn't "get it".

It would take forever to try to explain it to him, he would just debate everything anyway.  lol  So I DARED him to create a female profile, provided him with pics of my cousin that didn't show her face but you could tell that she was attractive (with her consent).  Told him not to even try...didn't even have to really engage...Just say "Hi".  Told him to get back to me & let me know what he figured out.  :)

Two days later he called me up & said...

"On behalf of my entire gender...I sincerely APOLOGIZE!  O_o  WTF is wrong with MEN?"  lmfao!!!

Sometimes I'd be scrolling through & I'd see a guy that was actually just a really good guy trying to reach out & talk to someone.  He'd be at the point of frustration & was taking things personally because he just didn't understand the problem from our perspective!  So I'd drop him a line & try to help him out!  I'd briefly try to explain the problem & tell him how to solve it!  :)  I thought I was actually being nice!

"If you...*do this*...then you'll get the response that you're looking for!" and I'd even explain WHY it would work!  :)

After hearing "Whatever!  Don't tell me what to do!" I gave up.  :(