What is it like to have a penis?

• Urination - While not a thought about the penis, per se, it is nonetheless an act that requires mechanics that inevitably come back to the penis.  During urination, for most men, a concerted effort has to be invested into ensuring that negligible amounts of urine remains on the tip of the penis in order to avoid the dreaded "pee spot" on the pants (this concern is amplified greatly in dressy situations).  When visiting guests, men have to ensure that urine hasn't splattered all over their bathroom (some cultures avoid this issue by teaching men to sit while peeing, though many men are enamored with "standing to pee" [myself included] and won't be convinced to sit while urinating).
• Masturbation - We all do it. Men, statistically, do it more.  I won't get into the details as to why, but young boys can crank one off in just a few minutes and numerous times a day.  It isn't unheard of for many pubescent males to punch the clown up to a dozen times a day.  The numbers taper off starting typically at 22, but I'm 36 and I can't remember going more than 24 hours.  I have friends in their late 30's and early 40's who admit that it's a twice a day activity.  Even though it may be only once a day, a good deal of thought comes down to and revolves around "the moment" and "the window of opportunity".
• Protection - Having the reproductive organs on the outside of the body, especially ones that are (typically, though not always) sensitive to object strikes, pinches and weird shifts in position, is a conspicuous vulnerability.  Years ago, when I was a "front end manager" at a retailer, the register bays were set up in such a way that the partition that surrounded each one was at nut-height (I'm 6", with my "nut height" at an average location).  I had to regularly enter and leave (to do over-rides or give change orders) by squeezing by the cashier.  I was forever rushing and forgetting to turn and avoid the sharp wooden corner.  Being squeezed into the register bay was always a bit uncomfortable, so there was always this weird "pressure" to get the hell out of there.  Like all guys, I turned and exerted just a bit too much force to leave but forgetting about the goddamned corner and crunched the sharp wooden edge right into my sack.  I'm one of those guys with extremely, EXTREMELY over-sensitive balls.  A mis-directed breeze or poor positioning while sitting (causing the dreaded "crotch squeeze"), can send me into a fit of agony. 
  Not all men are the same, but we are all aware of the need to be aware of ball-tapping, or the potential thereof, by objects around us.  It is no wonder that our instincts in unsure situation is to drop the hands to the groin to protect that broveries.
• Function - We're talking "how well does it work in bed", as a separate issue from "health" (as in disease, which is a separate bullet point).  Most men who enter their late 30's/early 40's start to experience lower functionality of their favorite friend.  Most will never talk about it.  But, it's something we all think about. 
  We also fret about how long we last during sexual situations.  This is not to say that all men have to worry about this issue.  I've known men who struggle with taking an INORDINATE amount of time and I've known men who've admitted to having a 30 second ticket-time.  Either way, even the best trained men, expend some degree of thought on exactly how long they should take to achieve their moment of glory before their partner finishes.
• Sex - This might seem like something that is covered by the above bullet point, but its importance deserves its own bullet point.  In general terms, "sex" isn't just about the penis.  I guy can be thinking about "giving" oral sex or motor-boating or whatever.  But, ultimately, sex--the frequency and intensity thereof--comes back to Little Peter, and Peter eventually demands attention.
  Men, evolutionarily, are a "quantity over quality" group (which is not to say, we don't like quality, it's just that bragging rights have always gone to the guy who got the most, not the best; which is a unique inverse of ladies who--AFAIK--tend to focus on and brag about the quality over quantity).  We spend a lot of time strategizing about how to get it and where to get the deed done.
• Fertility - As in, the option men have in retaining theirs and the pressures to have a vasectomy to prevent unwanted pregnancies.  This may seem a fringe issue, but I don't know a single sexually active hetero who, after siring his desired number of offspring, doesn't begin to weigh the benefits of having his two best friends ligated from giving him more mouths to feed. "
  Just as well, there are men who--despite their best efforts--have to fret over their ability to pass on their genetic material.
• Size, Shape, Pitch and Yaw - Take your pick.  Depending on the personal tastes of a man's desired partner (male or female), these can be make-or-break factors.  The "size" issue being the most--errrrrr--weighty.  Just as well, I've known men and women who've balked at various issues about girth, length, pitch, curve and yaw.  Given society's obsession with--well--everything, it's a guarantee that at some time or other, men will fret about these issues as well.
• Integrity of Foreskin - In some countries it's a bigger deal than others.  If you're in the USA (and white), Israel, Islamic States, South Korea & the Philippines, it's highly likely that you're going to be circumcised.  There will likely be the expectation that you be circumcised and potential partners may see it as a sticking point if you're not.  Canada and Australia all have fairly high rates of circumcision, though the numbers are dropping precipitously because their respective health services no longer cover the procedure.
  In the rest of the world, it's seen--outside of religious practice--as a weird aberration.  I know that when I was in Spain, the men that I, um, knew were fairly fascinated with the whole thing.  Likewise as a circumcised American, I was rather curious about the alternative as well.  This--from conversations with my hetero and homo friends--is also a point of interest (though, with straight men, rarely admitted beyond ribald commentary) in them as well.
• Health - We're talking urethritis, prostatitis, gonorrhea, syphilis as well as numerous others.  There's a lot of shit out there that can infect and hurt the little guy.  Most men don't curl up and rock back and forth in dark corners in fear of these things, but we're aware of them and when the thought does occur, it typically elicits a frightful reaction.  Having had my share of health problems (no STD's, just general health issues)--tests of which typically required a Q-Tip to be inserted therein[a]--I can say, the whole thing is pretty disconcerting.  As men age, they tend to grow out of the "it'll never happen to me" mentality and start taking the proper precautions against the preventable illnesses.
  [a]Pretty sure the thing was coated in Tabasco sauce and rolled in glass shards before insertion, though the doctor insisted otherwise.
• Modesty - Regardless of our general endowments, certain types of clothing can provide too much information about what's going on down-under.  Depending on the affair (swimming, dining, job interviews, etc), a guy may be required to wear a specific variety of under-garments.  Some don't care. 
  Oddly enough, penis position isn't the same in all men.  Some men are slightly "more forward" (that is, when judged against men of equal endowment, theirs might be located slightly higher and more forward on the pelvis) and others are down into the crotch a bit more.  Men who have a higher/forward penis location tend to protrude a bit obviously (and unsightly) from their cloths.  This might be a faux pas in professional and dressy situations.
  Regardless, there's always the possibility of a rogue erection (especially as teenagers), and depending on the situation, tighter-fitting underwear might be required.
• Comfort - Linked closely to the previous bullet point (and the one before that), the type of underwear a man wears may affect his reproductive ability, the health of the member, modesty and--of course--his comfort.
  Personally, I don't get boxer shorts.  Might as well go commando.  I know there's the "keeping the boys away from the body as nature designed it", but there are too many engineering issues that lead to pain and chaffing.  Boxer briefs are the preferred underwear for most men, including myself.
• Care and Appearance - Some men groom a good bit ("manscaping").  Some do not.  Some just opt for a simple trim.  From conversations I've had with men (keeping in mind that my entire circle of friends are straight men, except for one gay friend), the general trend is:  shave the balls, trim the shrubbery around shaft. 
  Beyond that, men--especially those who've retained their foreskin--are aware of the potential for an off-putting effluvium.  Cleanliness, therefore, ends up being of significant importance.  If you have a man as your partner, observe--ever so slightly--the care he places in making sure that the general region is thoroughly cleaned (unless he's a Cro-Magnon, then--well--never mind).  Younger men on the prowl tend to be a bit more concerned about the two issues in this point because of their awareness of the general standards the ladies.
• Other men's opinions thereof (in heteros) - Men care about what other guys think about their junk.  Don't listen to men who claim otherwise.  They care.  Few men ever compare and fewer men still actually pull out the exact stats, but all men--at some time or other--spend a good deal of time bragging about the general stats of their penis.  This fades with age and maturity, but it's there, and in the back of the mind of all men is how they compare to the competition, even if they aren't competing anymore.
• Other men's opinions thereof (in homos) - Exactly the same as straight men, except we actually do the physical comparisons during various interludes.  Some sexually-social gay men do this more than others, but being gay doesn't relieve a guy of the concern for his general comparative stats to other men.

An external appendage between your legs which needs to be taken care of like a baby so that you can have some.

How does it feel like to carry your life in a sack technically and literally dangling outside your body?

How does it feel to have a perfect natural demonstration of Venturi effect?

Calling it “silencer” because it literally mutes the sound of you urinating.

How does it feel to have an animal which is extremely difficult to tame once it gets up to hunt?

If aimed at a perfect angle with respect to sunlight, you can observe dispersion. Technically, you just rainbow-ed while you urinated.

Let's not talk about the “aim wars” we can have with penises. I think it should be an Olympic sport.

Extremely convenient to have quickies. You don't have to struggle all the way through act. Just open the fly and bam! There you go.

Urinating while standing? No problem Eh!

Take up the maximum sitting space because there is no other option and crumpling it's family is pretty painful.

Can't be romantic without getting awkward. Bleh!

KT

I believe Monty Python said it best.

Monty Python’s Meaning of Life (1983)

Isn't it awfully nice to have a penis?
Isn't it frightfully good to have a dong?
It's swell to have a stiffy,
It's divine to own a dick.
From the tiniest little tadger
To the world's biggest prick!
So three cheers for your willy or John Thomas.
Hooray for your one-eyed trouser snake.
Your piece of pork, your wife's best friend,
Your Percy or your cock.
You can wrap it up in ribbons,
You can slip it in your sock.
But don't take it out in public,
Or they will stick you in the dock
...And you won't
a-come
a-back.

• it's out there all the time. Guys get very familiar with their organ and learn all about it early on.
• It's fun to play with, especially the erection part. To see it start out small and get big is a lot of fun.
• Orgasms (supposedly) feel about the same as for women, but those with penises get to shoot something out, which is cool but messy.
• Peeing standing up. 'Nuff said.

• having to adjust it all the time. As a guy, it's possible to forget it's there sometimes if you're focused on something else, but adjusting it at different points during the day is one of the disadvantages of having a penis.
• uncalled-for erections at inopportune times, particularly as a teenager. Embarrassing and there's not much you can do about it. Women, at least, can mostly hide arousal.

Well I'm gonna make an in depth answer so that you get the best answer. First off, waking up, sometimes you have a boner or as most guys call it morning wood. It basically means you can't pee. So you basically are stuck having to pee until you aren't. Another thing is similar, getting a boner randomly or when you are in public, it can be embarrassing.

On a sexual level, having a penis is great, considering I've never had a vagina. But first off, masturbation. when we decide to masturbate we take the skin bellow the head of our penis and jerk it up and down. (Jerking off) and its a rising feeling from the bottom of our penis then to the top. Its deeply satisfying. I'm not the best at describing the feeling. Its like when you get butterfly's in your stomach but it doesn't cause you uncertainty like you would if you actually had butterfly's. Its a great feeling. And I am often wondering what is it like for a female to masturbate?

So If you don't mind maybe we could answer each others questions.